Most men do not avoid help because they think nothing is wrong. They avoid the part where you choose a stranger and start talking.
These pages are for the man who has been meaning to sort it out for a while. They carry the real numbers rather than a comfortable version of them.
Half the referrals
The NHS Talking Therapies annual report counted almost 600k men referred in 2023-24. That is half as many as women.
The BABCP reads that as 33% of referrals, against 66% for women.
Men made a third of referrals
Referrals to NHS Talking Therapies in England, 2023-24
Men made 33% of referrals to NHS Talking Therapies in 2023-24. Women made 66%.
Referrals as BABCP reports them from the NHS Talking Therapies annual report. The small gap is referrals with another gender or none recorded.
Show the figures as a table
| Group | Share of referrals |
|---|---|
| Men | 33% |
| Women | 66% |
Need does not explain that. In England, 17% of men aged 16-64 have a common mental health condition. For women the figure is 28%.
More women than men have a common mental health condition
Adults aged 16-64 in England with a common mental health condition
17% of men and 28% of women aged 16-64 in England had a common mental health condition.
A common mental health condition in the week before the interview, measured by the Adult Psychiatric Morbidity Survey 2023/4. The survey reports by sex.
NHS England Digital: morbidity survey
Show the figures as a table
| Group | Share with a common condition |
|---|---|
| Men aged 16-64 | 17% |
| Women aged 16-64 | 28% |
The gap in need is far narrower than the gap in who asks for help.
Sources: NHS England Digital: talking therapies, BABCP: men's access, NHS England Digital: morbidity survey
The problem is the front door
The BABCP makes a useful point about what happens next. Once men do start treatment, their outcomes are comparable to women's.
That points at the door rather than at the treatment.
Being asked to read forty profiles and pick one is a filtering job. Most people who need support are in no state to do it, and many men will close the tab instead.
Source: BABCP: men's access
What this is
We are a connecting service, not a clinical one. We do not assess anyone and we do not diagnose anyone.
You have one short private conversation about what has been going on. We come back with a small number of professionals who work with it.
You do not need a diagnosis. You do not need the right words for it either.
Where to start
If you have been telling yourself it is not bad enough yet, start with waiting until it gets serious.
If you are the one everyone leans on, read when everyone relies on you.
References
- NHS England Digital (2024). NHS Talking Therapies for anxiety and depression, annual report 2023-24. digital.nhs.uk
- BABCP (2025). Men's access to talking therapies. babcp.com
- NHS England Digital (2025). Adult psychiatric morbidity survey 2023/4, chapter 1, common mental health conditions. digital.nhs.uk
Waiting Until It Gets Serious
Men often hold on until something breaks. The figures on midlife men are hard reading, and there is a lot of room before that point.
When Everyone Relies on You
For the man everyone leans on: at work, at home and in the family. Asking for help does not mean you stop being the one people count on.
